Sunday, June 29, 2008
Dear diary,
First of all, i would like to wish NurulAin a Happy Belated Birthday.
Happy 15th birthday Ain.
(:
I love you soo much.
Hope you have a joyful and wonderful life ahead.
Last Long Ain(:
Not a long post for today due to some problems.
Having a fight with mother yesterday.
Soo shut up.
P/s: There is always noone to replace my place as his girlfriend.
"for me life is shattered"
& wishing it was true.
Friday, June 27, 2008
Dear diary,
I've been worrying about my baby for the last 5 hours.
The shocking part was that baby went down quickly just to meet me.
The emotional part is where i started crying on his shoulder and telling him that i've been worried for 5 hours.
And he told me that he was ok but for me, his not.
):
He tried his very best to cheered me up.
Thank you baby.
And Sorry baby, i didn't talk that much with you within that 2 hours.
):
All i could say is now, Muhammad Abdillah Shah Bin Hasbullah can never be replace, forever.
His my life saver.
Went for self training but end up we played soccer.
How cool and tiring could that be.
(:
Overall, i had a lot of fun with all of them.
Especially, Amirah and Nabilah.
Thank you.
Natasha Andiny Dewi Putri, take good care of yourself in Indonesia.
Im going to miss you.
Upon everything that happen today, i realise that miracle does exist.
Unexpected things would happen.
The wants that you want or even just a luck.
Tomorrow going out with Baby, Muzhafar, Khairul and Faris.
1.30pm sharp at doomed. "Sape lambat hafizah pukul."
(:
"there's always a high standards on you and me"
& wishing it was true.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Dear diary,
To: Dearest Zulqarnaen, my ex's.
Sorry if i had tried to avoid you in any ways. I didn't meant to do that.
It wasn't my intention either. Im sorry if i had make you feel angry nor sad.
If there's anything wrong, please tell me face to face.
Im ready to hear everything that doesn't goes well.
To: My Gay, Farid.
Tomorrow. (:
To: Amirah, Baby and Kiren.
Get well soon pantats because i missed you guys already.
Take medicines and not drugs.
(:
P/s: They said we are not allowed to be close friends with our ex's.
"& i love MASBH a lot"
& wishing it was true.
Monday, June 23, 2008
Dear diary,
Today was a terrible day for me.
Mr Khan is leaving, studying is compulsary and training is a purpose.
Well due to some unsuspectful thing happen.
I feel like im being watch over someone.
Someone and a bunch of people.
):
I just couldn't do anything but just to avoid it.
)):
But, something did cheered me up.
Muhd Abdillah.
((((((((((((((((((:
I love you.
"rotting without you is such a disgrace"
& wishing it was true.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Dear diary,
Today went out with my Mr Man, Abdillah.
Went to open plaza at tampiness mall.
We watch the anugerah band finalis.
I tell you, its freaking wild!
But i love it.
Videos can't be publish.
Too bad!
(:
Adiooos!
P/s: Cucu Datok Merah would always be my star.
"muhd abdillah shah"
& wishing it was true.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Dear diary,
The world doesn't seem fair sometimes.
For example, you want to live as long as you can but you can't.
Another example, you don't want any history of yours to be repeated but it repeated itself.
Another example, you want to pass all of your subjects but instead of passing you failed.
Not everything that we want we could have it.
We need to sacrifise, think and make a desicion.
For me, i look at this world it is full of mischieves.
Full of suprises.
Full of entertainments.
Full of laughter.
Full of dissapoinment.
Perhaps, i should try to think that i could do anything if i believe.
Soo, i need to believe in things that are impossible to me.
Well, im currently missing school hours.
I miss all of my friends, girlfriends and my gays.
I should focus more on Final Year.
(:
"muhd abdillah shah"
& wishing it was true.
Friday, June 20, 2008
Dear diary,
There are many possibility to choose from.
One, you need to think for what your current ex do.
Does he take good care of you or just let you down alone.
Two, you need to know whether he will always be there with you everytime you need him.
Eventhough, it's just a small cut.
Three, choose what your heart tells you.
Without feelings, you can't love that person.
Isn't everything i wrote down is correct?
In every decision, there's always a very simple reason for it.
The time when you need a break, its not just a break.
Its about how he treats you and how your heart feels.
Soo, thats the reason why i ask a permission for breaking up.
I think and reflect, it does not make any difference.
Now, i found someone who is ready for everything.
He is always by myside.
He is brave enough to meet me late at night just to check whether im ok or not.
He help me to see that the world is fair.
He told me everyone has its own illness.
He show me true love.
Even one of my ex's does not show me their true love.
Currently my ex's will always make me cry.
I never felt as happy as this before in my whole life.
This current boyfriend does mean everything to me.
I don't want any of my history to appear.
Im sick and tired to cry for my love one's.
"abdillah junior"
& wishing it was true.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Dear diary,
Can't wait to go out today.
(:
Yesterday was super fun.
And i just love him.
P/s: i've broke up with zul last few days already.
"change my world"
& wishing it was true.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Dear diary,
Saturday and Sunday there's going to be a wedding.
Soo im not free to go down and have fun anymore.
But surely, Monday i will.
Floorball plus soccer.
How cool could that be?
Going to miss Abdillah for a moment or two.
(:
"last long"
& wishing it was true.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Dear diary,
Today was actually my street soccer match.
Due to there are already five people playing in my team i have to back out.
(:
Fun watching them play.
Next time my turn to play.
After the soccer match we went to our usually place to continued playing soccer and birthday bash.
Went home around 11pm.
Very tired.
Well, tomorrow there's test for first aid.
I know i couldn't make it.
)':
P/s: long lost friend((:
"he touch the hand without warning"
& wishing it was true.
Monday, June 9, 2008
Dear diary,
First aid wasn't my game actually.
I hate it most.
I hate it when i was young and until now, i still hate it.
After school went down to my childhood playground.
Meet all of my long lost friends plus my unbiological brother.
Played soccer for awhile because unbiological brother have to sent his girlfriend home.
(:
Went back home with unbiological brother.
Eat and currently doing my First Aid homework.
):
If only it was training.
Im free of all those writting.
P/s: I miss floorball training a lot.
"i don't feel you love me anymore"
& wishing it was true.
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Dear diary,
Today, everything is down.
Especially me.
Everything seems to be wrong.
Im not ok.
Getting fever plus runing nose.
Couldn't get sufficient sleep at night.
All of it turns out wrong.
I don't know why im like this.
Maybe the hormones are developing.
Mind are changing.
Everything is changing.
):
Feelings are terribly changing.
My head is spining.
Feels dizzy and heavy.
Feel like banging it to the wall.
Feel like breaking this head apart.
I just wanted to say,
maybe im not the girl that you've been looking for. Maybe, everything will seems ok if we turn the other way round. Maybe friendships are better than relationship. How long can it stay? It depends on you and me.
We make the decision to last long or to let it go. For me, we're better off the other way round because there seems to be something hidden between you and me that i didn't know. I'll just let the world spins and see the results. Is it the end or is it just the begining.
I feel different this days.
):
"soo not me"
& wishing it was true.
Saturday, June 7, 2008
Dear diary,
I want that laptop.
Vaio.
Black.
Everything that is mine, i want it black.
HAHAHA!
Hope that i get it one day.
Plus one more thing that i've been craving for.
Olympus Camera.
Calculate everything its about $4000+.
Nevermind.
Still have one more year to go.
(:
"don't call me your baby anymore"
& wishing it was true.
Friday, June 6, 2008
Dear diary,
HAHAHAHA!
Back with computer. So not in hiatus nomore.
I am a life saver.
Maybe i could be like Mr Rahim ya, IT.
((:
Talk with the singnet person, name Fadli.
HOHOHO!
And now everything is alright.
Thanks to me.
And Mr Fadli.
HAHAHA!
Goodnight Mr Fadli and thank you.(:
SINGNET YOU ROCKS MY UNDERPANTS FOR TODAY.
P/s: I don't want public speaking. SHY.
"im back my computer is back can kick ass"
& wishing it was true.
Dear diary,
Currently posting this post at Amirah's house.
Home computer broke down yesterday, now in ICU.
Haven't been operate yet.
So on HIATUS until i get my computer recovered back.
Too bad, i'll be losing a lot of news.
)':
HAHAHAHHAHAHA!
And i know who is MR A.
HAHAHAHHA!
You guys no need to know ok?!
(:
ON HIATUS.
P/s: i miss someone.
"complete my life with air"
& wishing it was true.
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
Dear diary,
Today was not the day i expect it to be.
Everything was not ok.
Didn't train for floorball.
Didn't even hear a single word from Mr Lim.
Yes, im sad.
But not only sad, i feel more than that.
Jealous, dissapointed, lost of hopes and dumb.
))':
Jealous because Mr Lim trained TJC.
):
Dissapointed because some did not attend floorball today.
)):
Lost of hopes because no MR LIM today.
))):
Dumb because simply i am one of it.
D':
I feel bad.
Soo soo soo bad.
Why?
Ask the walls.
):
BUT!
I, Amirah, Nabilah, Syakirah, Hamilah, Shafiqah, Atiqah, Mardiah, Deena and Fazerah get the chance to play againts INOVA again.
YES AGAIN.
And it was a draw.
WOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Draw OK!
:D
Proud.
((:
Mummy beeb me around 2 plus.
She told me that she bought the food.
First i was like, 'what food?'
Second, 'oh food!'
Third, 'eeeeee food?'
HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Mummy's a understanding women.
Taaaadaaaaaa the 'food'.
It isn't an ordinary cake its a pie.
The swirls are the potato's.
It taste like lagsania.
DELICIOUS!
Until you can lick you underpants.
I tell you.
((:
No more words.
I don't have a sepet eyes, ok.
I have a big eyes for sure.
((:
P/s: who is Anon?
First Aid, nonononono!
"my favourite boy"
& wishing it was true.
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Dear diary,
Thought of forming a band.
Brother has his own band and me, none.
)':
I want to make a band.
(:
But hahaha, i can't.
I need to sacrifise that for awhile.
Floorball is the main point.
(:
Singapore Floorball League is next.
There would be some from ITE and other school attending that match.
Maybe there would be East View Secondary.
((:
Maybe if i finish my secondary school life, i'll be moving on of getting a band members.
But its going to be 1 year later.
((:
I thought of something recently, i want to study hard from now onwards.
So that i could end this secondary school life fast(: .
And i can't fucking wait.
(:
Going to take a shower after this.
((:
P/s: f a r i d(:
"listen to your heart and make that move"
& wishing it was true.
Monday, June 2, 2008
Dear diary,
Yesterday, didn't get to eat Kebab again.
But its not a big deal anymore.
(:
Wait is what i will do.
Today, baby is giving his teeth a check up.
Hopefully, his alright.
((:
♫♫♫
Its been awhile that i had listen to a song which is given by someone.
When i listen to it, tears went down my cheecks.
I felt terrible.
The tittle was my name.
Norhafizah.
Except for the Nor.
)':
The song really hurts me.
The lyrics was soo touching.
If only i had the chance to talk to him again, the first word would be is 'sorry'.
Yes sorry.
Sorry for leaving him like that after knowing he is attach.
It was my mistake.
And it seems that you still care for me.
Every lesson which you had to walk pass my class.
You will always look inside.
))':
I felt terrible.
Soo terrible.
When it came to recess time, you would always look at me while drinking.
You make me feel like im being watch by a stranger.
But that time, i had to leave you.
Because your girlfriend was bugging me out.
I could not stand it and i just let you rot alone.
How bad could i be?
And now, i have my own boyfriend to look after while your having a crises with your girlfriend.
Now, i feel its not fair for you.
But i couldn't do anything to help you.
Im sorry.
D':
Soo sorry.
That guy, use to sent me to school.
Comfort me and now his a stranger to me.
Khuzairie.
Im sorry.
Zulqarnaen,
Baby i know you will feel down when you read today post.
Once again, im sorry.
But, i just can't stand it.
The song haunt me down like a dog haunting its prey.
Its really sucks. I didn't meant to make you hurt if you read this.
But you already know that i only love you.
Yes, you.
My heart sticks like a glue for you.
Its hard to let you go.
Even when i let you go, i know i won't survive.
Your the only hero who could make me happy.
Make me feel like im in heaven.
Baby, what ever it is.
I love you.
And its true.
P/s: if i had made a mistake, im sorry baby boy.
"im not that perfect like the rest"
& wishing it was true.
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Dear diary,
Doing nothing right now.
Im just not prepared for tomorrow's training.
(:
At last, i call baby yesterday.
And i told you its fun for me.
I miss his laughter and he laugh a lot yesterday, so do i.
We never talk to each other like yesterday.
And i miss the day when we talk like that.
(:
Today, my aunt is coming.
Maybe at night we intend to eat Kebab.
((:
Double happy.
For you guys out there who i have scold about a small thing, im sorry.
Once again im soo sorry.
(:
Effa, Ain, Faanaa, Fazlin, Issha, Ayesha and many more is coming back from Serawak tomorrow.
HAPPY(:
Soo happy.
((:
EFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!
FAAAAAAAAAAAANAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
ISSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
AYESHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
:D
I can't wait.
((:
"your the sun who never fails to brigthen up my life"
& wishing it was true.
