typing.

Friday, October 31, 2008

Dear diary,

Away and Away.

Rotting in this chair. Sitting right infront of the computer. Typing and staring alone.
Thinking when will i get my big brother back.
Thinking why people change.
Thinking why i can't forget my ex.
Thinking about my future.
Everything and everything.

This question keep on flowing through my brain to my brain cells and to my veins.
Blood is pressuring my brain cells. Trapping the air inside making it worst.
My head is spinning, my stomach is dizzing.
Ryhtem of music makes it calm but not so.
Head is banging like a rockstar.
Stomach is spinning like a washing machine.
Heart ache won't be heal.
Memories won't be erase.

I just miss one of me ex.
He was the greatest of all.
The loveble of all.
~~FADLI~~.
The memories is painful to forget.
The love is hard to erase.
God, i still ~~love~~ him.
I miss him.
Sometimes how i wish, i could turn back time and say that im sorry all over again.
All over and over and over again.
Because of you, i can't move on with life so easily.
I tried to forget about you but its haunting me down like a ghost.
How could i forget you?
It just makes me remember about you.
The scar which i do on my left hand just won't heal.
The stain is still there.
How could i ever forget you.
Your pictures in my folder.
Your pictures in my handphone.
I can't get rid of you.
I just can't.
I swear it hurts me a lot.
Yes, it hurts.

Can this sickness bring me to the hospital bed?
Can it cradle me to my coffin?
Im just sick and tired with my mind and self.
I hate myself sometimes.
Stupid memories and less time to erase it.
I can't do it alone.
I just can't.
My heart could not take it nomore.
Heart ache, Heart pain.
Hatred.
I just simply don't understand with myself sometimes.

Better grades, better results next year.
That's what i promise to one of the seniors.
HAHAHAHAHA!
Asssssssssssssss.
Pay attention and no more joking around.

If i were a boy,
i would switch off my phone and go out to take a walk.
To take out my ciggerates and light it up.
To chase all the girls.
To feel the best in the world.
If i were only a boy for a day.
(:

Many people make my day.
But it won't stay long enough to heal all of this shits.
)':

Im sorry but i lose hopes already.
I lose so many chances too.

p/s: i spoilt my life.

"ciggerates please"

& wishing it was true.

the blogster.

Siti Nur Hafizah Bte Musa / SNHBM.
Known as Dummy Fii or even Ketot.
140793.
Single.
Pampered.
Daddy's little babyy.
Allergics: Dark Chocolates.
ITE Mac Pherson.

Other applications :
!Facebook.
!Twitter.

my say.

Cherish others before it's too late.
Without love or support from others, you are nothing.
Stand by to the people who needs our help.
Give your fullest attention to the people you love before you lose them.

Nobody can change us, we are who we are.
Perfections is not everything, it always comes back to the heart.
In life there will always have some challenges.
It's us to decide to settle it in a fair or unfair way.
Life is precious, so live life to your fullest.

~~tune in~~

Plug in to your own IPOD / MP3 / MP4.
Groove to your own beat not others.
Be yourself and stop listening to other people songs, mango fruit !

~~Taggy Board ?~~

To spammers and losers, hello mother freak.
Thanks for dropping by for tagging or whatever shit ok ?
But seriously tagging without real name or link is such a fucking cyber losers.
Get a life and stop bothering about people's life maybe your own life is not perfect yet so make yourself perfect before spotting other's MISTAKES !
Thanks bitches and dick-ers.